Ch-Ch-Choices

Ok so I'm not going to lie...last night was kind of a killjoy. I went to work out and by the time I was done with my WOD at Team Crossfit Academy, I was on the verge of tears. At the beginning of class we heard more about the Paleo Challenge, and that 41 women are now signed up. Immediately the self doubt started to creep in and I started to wonder what I had gotten myself into. My entire workout, this is what I was thinking: These women that I will be competing against in this weight loss challenge are BAD ASSES, ATHLETES and COMPETITORS. They are runners and weight lifters. They do pull ups unassisted and push ups from the toes. I get winded running to the corner, I use 2 assist bands for pull ups and can barely eek out 5 push ups from my knees. Don't even get me started on the lame 4 inch box that I am scared to jump on. I am, for the most part, always in last place. So maybe I shouldn't even bother...I mean there is SO MUCH work to be done, I have such a long road ahead of me. Do you understand now why I was on the verge of tears while I was trying to keep up during work out?

So I have a choice to make...every day, every minute actually we all have choices to make. I can listen to the voice in my head saying that it's too much work, that I'm not going to win, and go back to eating cheeseburgers and chocolate peanut butter ice cream from Baskin Robbins because it's "safe', it's comfortable and it's what I know. Or, I can take a moment to breathe, acknowledge that negative little voice inside my head, and change it's mind. Of course it's going to be a long road, nothing that's worth it is ever easy. Yes, there's a lot of work to be done...I've led a sedentary lifestyle for 33 years and ate anything and everything I wanted to for the same amount of time...but the work is not going to do itself. I mean wake up every morning and look in the mirror and I'm not getting any skinnier...the fat fairy isn't going to come tonight and take away 3 extra chins and the extra loveliness from my inner thighs and belly. It's not going to happen. There is no one single choice I can make that will magically transform my body into what I want it to be. It has to be one choice at a time. That's what got me to this point, one wrong choice after another...so I know for a fact that one right choice after another can lead me away from this place....

I will do this...

Last night's dinner:  Chipotle: salad, no rice, no beans, with fajita veggies, chicken, pico de gallo and a little corn.

Breakfast: 2 hardboiled eggs, 1/2 of a small avocado, and a handful of olives.

Lunch: 1 zucchini, 1 yellow squash, the other 1/2 of the avocado.